15 simple ways to relax at bedtime

It can be hard to wind down after a stressful day full of work, chores, anxiety, and kids, so here are 15 simple ways to relax and get ready for sleep!

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Do you find yourself lying awake long after you’ve turned the light off and decided it’s time to sleep? Do you struggle with being able to relax enough to drift off? 

Then you're far from alone, and this is for you! I've rounded up 15 simple ways to relax at bedtime, both mentally and physically, so you can find exactly what you need.

Mental Relaxation

One of my main problems is that I can’t turn off my thoughts -- they keep churning round and round with everything that happened during the day, everything that needs to be done tomorrow, and that embarrassing thing I did three years ago. A great solution to this is to distract your mind or simply empty it out by one of these techniques.

1. Journal

Writing down your thoughts lets you express the feelings and ideas surrounding them, which makes it easier to let them go. Keep a journal by your bedside so you can write down what’s bothering you no matter what time it is.

2. Listen to an audiobook

Sometimes even journaling doesn’t help to stop your brain from running on overtime, so have an audiobook ready to listen to when you turn off the light. By doing this you give your brain something to concentrate on and something to engage with instead of troubleshooting that new project at work.

​I recommend listening to something you have heard or read before, though -- don’t fall into the trap of staying awake to find out what happens. Also, make sure that it won’t run all night, because that will leave you exhausted. Set it to turn off after 30-60 minutes. (Spotify finally got a sleep timer setting!)

3. Keep a gratitude journal

I am a big fan of gratitude journals. You probably already know the concept; write down three things every night that you’re grateful for. Doing this every day actually rewires your brain to feel, and expect, happiness! By focusing on the positives in your life you will feel content and grateful, and thereby more relaxed.

​Photo by Ava Sol

4. Read

Looking at your phone or watching TV the hours before bed is terrible for your sleep quality since it inhibits the production of melatonin, the sleep hormone. So what should you do to stay entertained? Just read an old-fashioned book. It has the same effect as listening to an audiobook by distracting your mind.

5. Make a to-do list for tomorrow

Something that can keep you up is thinking, strategizing, and worrying about the things you have to do the next day. By writing a to-do list you can relax by knowing it's there on paper and you won't forget. If you have any appointments or time-sensitive tasks, set an alarm on your phone to remind you even further!

6. Lay in bed and listen to music

Not exciting music, of course. But something calming, something soulful. Something that reminds you of nice vacation days or cozy movie nights. 

An album that always makes me relax is Josh Pyke's album Live at the Sydney Opera House. I talked about it in 7 beyond-easy ways to reduce driving anxiety and it really has something almost magical about it - no matter how anxious I am, the second I hear the first words of The Summer I calm down. So check that out or find something that has the same effect on you.

​Photo by Eric Nopanen

7. Chat for a few minutes

If you live with a roommate or a partner, take a few minutes as you get ready for bed talking about your days. I'm more of an early bird than my boyfriend, so I love when we actually go to bed at the same time and he shows me funny videos he saved for me on Reddit or share derpy things the dogs did. It creates a feeling of intimacy and security that helps me drift off to sleep faster.

8. Meditate

Just a few minutes of daily meditation lowers your stress levels and it even alters the way your brain responds to stress. Awesome, right?

It can be difficult though to start meditating if you’ve never done it before (I never think of as many things that need to be done as when I sit down to meditate), so I really recommend the free app Calm; it has guided meditation, a breathing guide, background sounds, and a simple timed meditation. Whatever you need that particular day.

Read a more in-depth review here.

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Physical Relaxation

A wired-up body can also make it difficult to relax enough to fall asleep.

​Have you ever had butterflies in your stomach when you’re nervous? Our bodies are very connected to our feelings, and when we are stressed our muscles tense up in order to guard themselves against injury and pain that surely must be imminent since we’re so wound up. Try some of these activities to let your body know that it’s okay to relax.

9. Take a shower or a bath

I love taking a long, hot shower or bath in the evening. Showering is a great way to reset your day (literally emerging clean and renewed), but it’s also a relaxing bedtime activity. Let the warm water wash away the stress from the day behind you and enjoy the feeling of crawling into bed all fresh and clean.

You can also combo this with reading a book! Mental and physical relaxation all in one. :)

Photo by Maddi Bazzocco

10. Get a salt lamp

Ever turn on the light in the middle of the night to find your way to the bathroom? It's not so pleasant to be blinded by the suddenly harsh light, and it's not great when you're trying to relax into sleep either.

I've had a salt lamp as a bedside lamp for years, and I absolutely love it. It emits such a soft yellow glow, it's like having a little campfire to read by. I really recommend getting one for the bedroom! They usually have dimmers too, so you can adjust it from reading-friendly down to sensual ambiance. ;) 

11. Open up the window

Unless it's the dead of summer or you live on a very busy street, open up your window and let the fresh air in. The optimal sleeping temperature is 60-67 degrees, so take advantage of the cool autumn and spring nights! Just lay in bed and listen to the sound of the wind or the cicadas.

12. Do some yoga

Yoga has so many health benefits, and one is the ability to relax you. Find a YouTube video with a relaxing sequence and end your day on a blissful note.

I subscribed to The Yoga Collective, a website with online yoga classes on demand, for a year, and I really liked their videos. They were categorized into different difficulty levels and categories, like relaxing and cardio, so you can find something just for you. I found a Groupon for just $12, and they often still have them!

13. Stretch

If you’re not much for yoga, stretching is an excellent alternative. Enjoy the feeling of your muscles giving in to the stretches and your body warming up. If you have an office job, focus on your shoulders, neck, and forearms, since they are subject to so many repetitive movements on a daily basis. A lot of headaches come from tight shoulder muscles, so doing this daily can even alleviate migraines!

Photo by Dane Wetton

14. Give/receive a massage

Surely you know how beneficial a massage can be, but did you know that even the person giving the massage receives most of the same benefits? That’s something to point out to your partner next time you ask for one! ;)

Along with releasing oxytocin, the feel-good hormone, and boosting your immune system (who has time to be sick, right?), it also bonds you as a couple. If you don't have a partner, find a friend to trade massages with!

Related article: Easy Swedish Back Massage Tutorial

15. Use lavender essential oil

Lavender has tons of health benefits, ranging from easing migraines, improving brain function and mental health, to treating acne, alleviating menstrual cramps, and most of all -- improving sleep and relaxation. 

Put a few drops of lavender oil in your oil diffuser, spray your pillow with a lavender linen spray, or pamper yourself with a lavender body lotion.

Related article: 8 gifts for anxiety & depression

Build a routine

Pick your favorite activities and build a bedtime routine. Doing the same things every day in the evening lets your body know that it’s time to sleep soon and makes it start to automatically wind down. It’s just like training your dog to come when you whistle -- give your body cues so it understands that it’s time to relax and recharge. 

It’s basically basic self-care; Do things that make you feel good, grounded, and relaxed, and enjoy the effect a night of good-quality sleep has on you.

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Related articles: 

• 13 easy things you can do TODAY to reduce morning anxiety!
• The breathing technique that helps with my anxiety
• How to schedule your day -- A guide for the easily overwhelmed

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