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So yeah, I know, I'm insanely after the times. ;) But better late than never, right?
(Psst, you can find me at erika_insearchofbetter! )
The truth is, I don't have a lot of pictures (that aren't of our dogs. . .) from the last 5 years. My ex-husband took tons of photos when we traveled, but I only have a handful because he was forever procrastinating editing them and in the end I never got them. Not a single picture from our honeymoon in St Lucia, just one from our long weekend in Paris. Very very sad.
To be honest though it wasn't really fun taking them -- I love HAVING photos, but I have a shall we call it unfortunate photo face where I have a tendency of looking drugged ;) Meanwhile, he was ridiculously photogenic. And he would keep taking pictures and want me to strike poses (very awkwardly, I might add) long after it stopped being fun.
So when I got together with my current bf and he hated being in photos I was pretty okay with just not taking any. The result is, I have now moved away from all the friends I made the last 3.5 years and I have so very few photos of all the fun stuff we've done.
So I've been trying to get more comfortable on camera! I even bought a Groupon for a budoir photoshoot, and it was an AMAZING experience! But more on that later ;)
It was so much easier with no one around, and with loud music playing I could dance around and get comfortable in my body. And no one had to see the bad photos! I started with my blog brand photo shoot, and now I'm playing around in my new city too, even though it might look ridiculous with me running back and forth to my tripod to check the photos and slightly adjust the phone. ;) But it's all practice in not caring what people think!
I had the tripod hanging upside down from a tree branch to take this photo!
I desperately want more cool pictures of myself (I only have 1.5 years left of my twenties! ;) ) so no better way than just making it happen, right?
We just upgraded our phones to the Galaxy S10s (leaving Apple behind) and the cameras are damn good, if I say so myself. Perfect timing! The bf has a good camera but honestly it's too much work for me to learn it, right now at least.
Play to your strengths and decide what battles to spend your energy on!
I realized though that I wanted an outlet for them, which would also be a good way to motivate myself to keep taking photos. Hm, I think they made an app for that! ;)
Photo by Georgia de Lotz
When I was 23 and newly married my then husband was sent to Afganistan, so we spent the first 8 months of our marriage apart. Yeah, it sucked. A lot. But I created a photo project for myself to try and make the rough time worthwhile -- I had this little stuffed Tiger I had with me on my travels, and I was going to take photos of what I was doing with him in the frame.
And I had a lot of fun with it! He's doing everything from backpacking in the Swedish mountains to working on my by now decade-long needlepoint project, it all depended on the day. But even though I took some awesome photos, the most important part was that I pushed myself to do things, even if it was for the sake of getting a photo that day. Instead of spending my days just counting down the weeks I went hiking, I met people, I went white river rafting. I grew and made some awesome memories instead of just crying, missing my husband.
It can be rough living in a social media world, and since I easily get jealous and feel inferior seeing the awesome pictures people post, I stopped posted on Facebook and never joined Instagram (until now). But if we can treat it as a creative outlet, as inspiration, as something that pushes us to enjoy life more, then I'm all for it.
"The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." -Steven Furtick
Related article: The 20 most inspirational quotes to motivate you when you feel stuck
So here I am, joining the rest of you. It's kind of easy to go exploring when you just moved somewhere, but once you've been somewhere for a while you usually stop. At least I do! It's the classic "living in New York but never been to the Empire State Building." And I don't want that to happen again! So by keeping myself accountable with Instagram, I will do my best to keep finding things to do and places to go. :)
I hope you check it out at erika_insearchofbetter! I just started but I promise I will add more! I'm quite enjoying looking at all the pictures my friends are posting and I would love to see what you guys are up to as well!
Hi, I'm Erika!
I know what it's like living with anxiety and depression, but living and living are very different things. I believe in practical tips and methods, and I will use them to help you be the brave, daring, darling individual you are.
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