Seasonal hobbies and feelings of guilt

6/28/2021

Person in orange sweater writing on laptop

I've spent the spring and summer feeling guilty about not writing more, when no one is judging me except myself.

Blogging is definitely more of a winter hobby for me.

It's cold and dreary, and the perfect time for my inside hobbies like needle-pointing, sewing, and writing. When the nice weather comes back all I want to do is be outside and take long walks, work in the garden, and lie in the hammock reading!

The problem is that I feel so guilty not writing. Especially since I was writing soo much the first months of the year, going from posting sometimes several times a week to not a single time in May makes me feel like I failed. Which in a way makes me even more unlikely to write.

The thing is though, I am like this with all my hobbies. I have cycles of being super into something and spend all my time doing it, and then after a few months my interest wanes and I start something else. And then, in a few months or maybe even a year, my obsession resurfaces again. Maybe because this one is so public I feel judged for "giving up", even though no one has said anything and I know I will come back to it?

Because this is why I only set my monthly writing goal in my accountability posts to be once a month. I knew that I would hit something like this, so I set the bar really low so I would only have to do the bare minimum to "pass." I knew that at some point I would get some weird block and not write for a while (which is what happened last month).

And why should I feel bad about writing less in the summer, when I don't judge myself for not gardening or going hiking more in the dead of winter? It makes perfect sense that certain things are more enjoyable at certain times of the year.

So I am trying to show myself some grace, because it's not like I haven't done anything with all my time not writing -- I have attacked gardening with a vengeance and have tons of cucumbers and tomato plants, bell peppers, lettuce, and herbs to show for it. And being fully vaccinated I have actually GONE OUTSIDE and DONE THINGS and MET PEOPLE. !!!

So I need to remember that I like writing, that it's not a chore, and revisit it when it feels good. And of course keep posting just once a month to still keep the ball rolling a bit, even if it's just a random post like this at the end of the month that's mostly for myself. :) I'm doing it and that's all that matters!

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